Thursday, October 28, 2010

Reading

That's what I've been doing lately, reading.  I used to read a lot.  I hadn't been lately.  It was nice to have that part of me come back to life again.  The part of me that just devours a good book, that gets completely lost in a story, that laughs and cries with the characters, that misses them when the book is done because it seems like we've become good friends through out their tail.  Part of my bust this funk was to read a book.  I'm so glad I put that on there!  It really helped!  The first book I read was The Bitch in the House.  I had read it before but as I was looking through my bookshelf for a book to read I was drawn to this one.  I didn't know why, I couldn't really remember that much about it.  I now know why.  It was exactly what I needed.  It's a compilation of essays by twenty six women about life.  How they view life.  The rage they feel.  The love they feel.  The aloneness of it all, the stress, the resentment, the self inflicted unobtainable expectations.  It was very validating to read.  I loved how I felt like I could in some small way relate to all of these women or even if I couldn't relate I could better understand what others think and how they feel about the lifestyle and decisions they've made (to be a working Mom, stay at home Mom, not have children, not marry, have an open marriage).  It helped me to judge less as I realized, once again we are all just women trying to make our lives the best we can.

I also just finished the Hunger Games series.  It took me all of three days!  I devoured the books!  I could not put them down.  At some points it was because the story was so good but at others it was just because I was relishing getting lost in a story, another place, another time, the life of someone else.  My house was neglected, facebook ignored, emails, texts unanswered, poor Croix found himself watching a lot of Baby Einstein, Brent found himself eating leftovers, but man they were good books!  I really liked how they ended.  It was not a typical happily ever after ending.  But considering what they had been through I think it was as happily ever after as they could get.  It was realistic, yet still happy.  I like that.  I consider myself a optimistic realist, that to me is how the books ended.  Now I'm playing catch up on the house, and super Mom with Croix trying to catch up and make up for my three lost days.  I think next time I'll have to pace myself a little better!

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Twister Anyone

Croix just loves his buddies Cade and Jacob.  When ever he sees them he gives them a big hug.  He laughs and smiles non-stop with them!  I think it's adorable.  I also love that despite the fact that they are so much older then Croix they still play with him! 
I was babysitting them the other night and they wanted to play twister.  I told they there were more then welcome to play but they needed to keep in mind Croix would want to play too.  That he might get in the way and be annoying, but if they were okay with that then they were more then welcome to play.  So we pulled out twister.  Sure enough Croix wanted to join in the fun.  It was hilarious!

Do you see that smile on Croix's face!


Croix's face here just cracks me up!  Such a goof!

Check out Cade's skills!  And Croix's big grin!





Just because it's cute.....Cade found Croix's hand puppets and made them
foot puppets too!

Later that night after all the fun Croix sat down to enjoy a book
Since I'm sharing things just because they are cute....How cute is this?!?!?!
Rubber ducky, and dogie, all a little boy needs!

Going Natural

When I wrote that title it made me think of this comercial.



This commercial makes me laugh!  I know it's cheesy! That's okay, it still makes me snicker.  Also it has nothing to do with my going "all natural" I just thought about it!

I'm going to share something with you that I haven't ever shared before.  First I will tell you the secret and then I will tell you the reason I never shared it before (so you don't make me regret sharing)

We got pregnant all on our own.  After over a year of being on a cocktail of different medications and multiple failed fertility treatments we took a break.  We didn't do a thing (well we did one thing ;) and we got pregnant.  Not a single medication.  Not a single treatment.  No charting.  Nothing.  To say the least I was completely shocked to find out I was pregnant!

This is why I never told you; if I heard one more person (because I did tell a few people) say "See you just needed to relax"  I was going to punch someone in the teeth!  If all we'd needed to do was relax we probably would have gotten pregnant in Hawaii, California, Las Vegas, Utah, Tucson, New York or any where else we were on vacation during the 2 years we were trying.  I'm sure anyone who said that had nothing but good intentions but it felt very invalidating.  If all we needed to do was relax then I'm sure my hormones would have all been exactly where they should have been and that I ovulated normally.  It felt like they were saying infertility was an emotional problem, all in my head, rather then the medical disease infertility truly is.  So with that said, that's why I never told you.

I'm not to the point of worrying that I'm not pregnant yet.  I don't really want to be yet, but if it were to happen now it would be a much welcomed blessing!  Despite not wanting to be pregnant right now I'm an action oriented person.  Which means I need to have a plan.  So here's my plan (for now, it may change, the Lord is good at changing my plans).  I'm trying a more natural approach this time.  Since the medical treatments are not what worked last time I don't see how it could be any less successful.

These are the natural alternatives I'm pursuing at the moment.  I'm taking Vitex.  Vitex is an herbal supplement.  (you can follow the link to read more about it)  I've had two friends with infertility who got pregnant using Vitex.  One of it's main uses is to help regulate a womans cycle.  Sounds great since I've never had a regular cycle.  Also my cycle has not really come back yet since weaning.  (That is if you don't count the slow leak {Spotting} I had for 50 DAYS recently).  I also read the side effects and they are minimal, definitely less then any thing I experienced from clomid or any of the other medications I was on.  I'm also trying Foot Zoning.  (Again you can follow the link for more information).  It is similar to reflexology which you are probably more familiar with.  It works along the thought that the entire body can be affected through working the feet.  I have a friend that does this and I'm very excited about trying it out.  In researching foot zoning I read that it is more beneficial for infertility for people with PCOS and unexplained infertility.  That's exactly what I have!  I also read about 7 out of 10 women seeking treatment for infertility were able to conceive!  I'm hopeing I'll have success in getting pregnant using these natural treatments.  If not I'll go back to my OBGYN and probably get on the dreaded clomid again. 

Now that we are thinking about number two all the fertility treatments are coming back to my memory.  All the side effects of all the medications.  All the tears.  All the dashed hopes.  The broken heart.  It's a little scary.  A new friend who sufferers from infertility as well, recently posted a comment about "come what may and love it".  That was exactly what I needed to hear!  It's not always easy.  It's easy to let the fear in and let the faith fade away.  With that said I've been having faith and praying and pondering.  I do know no matter what I have a son that has blessed my life beyond my greatest expectations.  If he is the only child we are blessed with, although it would be a disappointment, our lives will still be full and blessed!

Just for fun here's Croix and I dressed warm for the first time this year!
YAY for cooler weather!

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Laundry Room

I was reading a blog.  It's a crafting blog.  I think I'm going to unsubscribe.  I'm not crafty, I could be and I want to be, but I'm just not.  Maybe when I don't have a toddler I will be.  I don't know that seeing, day after day, how this woman makes all these amazing things from scratch and decorates so beautifully is so good for my self esteem!  Anyway today the post made me envious and then laugh!  It was about laundry rooms  It had these pictures from  here and here.

At first I saw those and wished my laundry room looked like that.  I thought "oh wouldn't I just love to do laundry in those rooms"  Then I laughed and thought "Yeah right!"  I don't think it would matter one bit what my laundry room looked like I am not a fan of laundry!  I highly doubt a chandelier in my laundry room would make me more prone to do the laundry, or enjoy pulling heavy jeans tangled with other clothes out of the washer and throwing them into the dryer.  I thought of what my laundry room looks like, what it's used for and decided that those laundry rooms are not functional for my life.
My laundry room is used for laundry, food storage, storage, and a dog room.  
This is what my laundry room looks like:
Isn't my food storage "beautiful"

My washer and dryer, despite my best efforts are continually piled with crap.


Storage shelves, dog crate, freezer, dog bed, random crap.

There's even this lovely damage courtesy of Rusty's separation anxiety he developed after Bosco died.

Also from the separation anxiety.  (now like it or not someday there will have to be a laundry room remodel!)

I was tempted to clean it up before I took the pictures because it's not always quite this messy.  To be quite honest though there are times it's worse.  You know what, that's ok.  It's a laundry room.  This is what a laundry room (to me) is supposed to look like.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Zoo

We went to the zoo last week with all Croix's cousins on the Maldonado side of the family.  It was his nap time so he was a little tired but he was a trouper and did good.  It was fun. 
Croix checking everything out.

 Kierstie, Croix, and Cate
 Max and Croix
 Just my little farmer.
 It cracked me up how he was walking around like this! 
With his diaper hanging out he looked so funny!
 Croix, random dude, Conner
Conner driving the truck
 Croix and I in the petting zoo area
(He was terrified!  He was clinging to my arm for dear life!)
 Ah the lazy life of an orangoutang!

On the way  home Cate passed out
It was so funny to watch her head keep bobbing around! 

Down To One.....I Guess

The past three days I put Croix down for his morning nap at his normal time, in the normal way with very untypical results.  He just screamed and screamed and screamed.  He even tried dashing out of the bedroom when we went in for story time!  Then as soon as I started singing him his song he started fussing.  Then he screamed, not cried but screamed his entire nap time.  Then he would only sleep 40 min for his PM nap!  Not long enough.  He was pretty grump.  I felt so bad for him. 

Well I can take a clue.  He's obvously tyring to tell me he's done with the morning nap.  So farewell morning nap we're down to just one nap.  I kept him up until 12 today (10:30 is normal nap time) at about 10:45 he was looking and acting tired.  I questioned the decision to just go head on into one nap.  Nope 3 days in a row he protested and refused a morning nap we're just going to do it.  He did ok.  He required lots of entertainment but he made it to 12:00.  Not I'm just praying he takes a long nap rather then this 40 minute business.  That is not enough sleep for my little one year old!
***He just woke up!  After only 45 min!  oh Heaven help me!***
So he woke up after only 45 min of napping.  Literally right after I typed "I'm just praying he takes a long nap" he started fussing.  I kept him up until 3:30 and put him down for a very late second nap.  We'll see  how long he sleeps.  Now what do I do tomorrow?   Try and go back to two naps tomorrow?  Try for one nap once again?  Sheesh!

 Since it's been a while since I posted any pic here are a few of late.


 He whacked his chin pretty well the other day.
 Daddy popped him up there. We all thought it was pretty funny!
 Eating is always an adventure,
 you never know where the food will end up!
Croix and Rusty are still great buddies.
Despite his frowny face he really was loving this!
The vacuum and carpet cleaner are some of his favorite "toys."
I've taken to taking pictures of us together or else I may never have any!
So sweet!
(See Brent will have plenty of sweet pictures like this, I will not, he's not the picture taker I am *sigh*)
He loves this little car!  I think it's so funny how it has a little storage under the seat, and Croix loves to stand in it!

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Why It Takes Me Six Hours to Mop My Floor

I woke up this morning and thought today is the day I'm going to mop my floor! I've been trying to get my floors mopped for over a week.  You might be wondering how it's possible to try to mop your floors for a week and not get it done.  By the end of this post you will wonder no more.
This is how my day went.
Wake up.
Get Croix up, fix us both a delicious and nutritious breakfast.
Doing the morning ritual of diaper change, watch the morning news for a moment to see the weather, make sure World Ward three hasn't started (I would need to know that).
Ok I've had my moment time to get to the floors.
I need to pick up all the stuff on the floors before I can vacuum them (I don't sweep I vacuum).
I realize if I'm going to vacuums the kitchen I might as well vacuum the living room.
Pick up all the toys in the living room.
Go comfort Croix from what ever has broken his heart.
Move on to the kitchen.  Pick up all the dished from Croix's cupboards he has free reign over.
All clutter has been picked up off the floors.
Croix is now screaming for attention.
Pop in Baby Einstein.
Back to the kitchen.
If I'm going to vacuum I need to clear off the counters since I'm lazy and just wipe all the crap off the counter onto the floor and then vacuum it up.
Start clearing off the counters.
Realize I need to go through the giant pile of papers on the counter.
Take majority of the pile to my recycling bin.
Realize recycling bin is full.
Take recycling bin and empty it into the one out side.  Try not to be angry since this is Brent's job, he's busy, I can take out the recycling.
Come back inside to a child who thinks he was abandoned.  Who wouldn't?  He couldn't see me for an entire three minutes.
Put Croix in his high chair, get a snack.
What am I doing?  Floors!  No, recycling.
Put recycling bin back.
Remember I need to switch the laundry I started last night.
Switch laundry, luckily I remembered before it started to smell so it doesn't need rewashed. (all to frequent occurrence at out house)
Back to clearing off the counters.
Glance at the clock 10:30, nap time.
Take Croix up stairs try not to rush nap time routine.
I try frantically to get as much done as possible during nap time!
I finish clearing off the counters!
Wipe off the counters.
Look at the dining room table, also full of crumbs, crumbs that should be vacuumed up too.
Clear off the dinning room table.
Wipe the dinning room table off.
Vacuum the floor!!!
Time to mop!
I go to fill the sink with water so I can mop the floors.
The sink is full of dishes, better put them in the dishwasher.
Open the dishwasher to find it full of clean dishes.
Start to empty the dishwasher and realize that since I tried to cram in a giant pan, the spinny thing could not spin, so the dishes are still dirty.
Take out the giant pan and restart the dishwasher.
Decide I don't have enough time to wait for it to get done to mop the floors so I'll just hand wash all the dishes and pans on the counter.
Croix wakes up.
Get Croix, spend a little extra time snuggling to make up for the neglect through out the morning.
Get us both a healthy and nutritious lunch.
Try and stick to my routine and so I sit down and read scriptures to Croix while we eat rather then eating bites of food between putting things away and continuing cleaning.
Finish lunch, more dishes.
Turn Baby Einstein back on, que Mom guilt.
Start washing dishes.
Wash the crock pot and remember that my visiting teachers are coming at 4 and Brent gets home at 5 and has class tonight and has to leave at 5:20.  I better throw something in the crock pot so Brent can eat dinner tonight.
Pause washing dishes.
Throw dinner together in the crock pot.  Realize I HAVE to go to the store for this meal, it now can't wait until tomorrow as planned.
Get myself and Croix dressed.
Check the clock 1:30, 30 min till nap time.
Rush to the grocery store in a wild attempt to get grocery shopping done and get home before 2, Croix's nap time.
As I pull up I get a phone call.  I'm trying to talk on the phone, carry Croix, my giant diaper bag, two reusable grocery bags and my shopping cart cover.  End up hanging up on my friend imagine that.  Sigh put the phone in the diaper bag.  Try and wrangle the shopping cart cover on the cart, phone is ringing.  Answer phone tell friend will call back later (humm I'm now trying to remember if I ever did that or not, don't think so)
Rush through the store trying to make sure that in my hurry I don't forget anything (thank goodness I remembered my list!)
Try not to rage at all the old people taking up an entire isle and feel the need to comment, touch, oogle, and stare at my adorable child.  Sorry people too busy today to appreciate it!
Check out get to the car.  Pray Croix doesn't fall out as I'm unlocking the car, wish for the one millionth time I hadn't lost my remote lock years ago.
Irresponsibly abandon my shopping cart at the closest "safe place" possible (really my groceries and child are in the car do you expect me to walk half way across the parking lot to put my cart where it belongs?)
Start to back up, look in my rearview and see the person behind me backing up as well, at the same time.
LAY ON THE HORN!!!  Slam on the breaks, throw in the car in drive and narrowly escape a parking lot accident I clearly do not have time for!
Sit in my spot for almost a full minute, in park, waiting for the other driver to leave, they have their backup lights on, I don't trust them!  I finally roll down my window and wave them out.  I think "Go back to Canada!!!"
Rush home.
Unload groceries, not all of them, just the chicken.  The rest can wait until after I put Croix down for his nap which he's now 30 minutes over due for.
WAY past nap time.
Go put Croix down for a nap, again trying not to rush.
Check my email that went off on my phone 10 times while being gone.
Croix is still awake.  (I usually sit on the computer for the 5ish minutes it takes Croix to fall asleep so I know what time he fell asleep so I know how much rest he gets, as this can affect bed time)
Check facebook for a second.
Croix is still awake.
Check blogger.
Croix is still awake, screaming now.
Well I've wasted enough of my day hoping he'd fall asleep, doesn't appear he's going to do that.
Get Croix up.  Get him some milk.
Baby Einstein, Mom guilt.
Back to the dishes.
CRAP!  The rest of the groceries are still in the car.
Finish unloading the rest of my groceries.  Say a prayer of gratitude for a garage and the fact that it's not 115 out side so they area still fine.
Finish dishes.
The sink is empty!
Fill the sink with mop water.
Try to mop the floors, but my poor neglected child is now screaming, with tears running down his face.  Less then an hour till my visiting teachers get here!
Snuggle Croix as long as possible, pop him in his high chair with a snack and talk and sing to him as I mop the floor.


Floors are mopped!!!

Go to get Croix down, he throws his entire snack on the floor.
Sigh.
Wash him up.
Get him down.
Wipe up the floor with a wash cloth, it will be clean for at least five minutes!!
Door bell rings, visiting teachers!
Poor Croix is rolling on the floor begging for attention.  Reminds me of my dogs, odd)
Kind visiting teacher plays with Croix.  I feel so, so bad as I see how desperately he just needs someone to tickle him.  Poor child!  I resolve stay on top of things better so I don't have to clean the entire house just so I can mop the floors!

Aside from the floors this is how the rest of my day went.
Visiting teachers walked out the door as Brent walked in the door.
Leave Brent to serve dinner for himself and Croix as I dash upstairs, change my clothes and get my massage room set up for my clients.
Come down stairs and say hi to Brent for five minutes before he has to leave for school.
Get myself some food.
Inhale food, since I only have ten minutes until my client is supposed to arrive.
Babysitter arrives.
Try and remember every thing I need to tell her.
Give her VERY specific instructions about giving Croix a bath.  "don't let him pick up the cup and and try and "drink" out of it with out emptying the water out first or he'll choke badly.  He also thinks he can stick his face in the water still so watch him close.  Shut him in the bathroom with you while you're drawing the water or else he'll try and walk down the stairs face first (a new and terrifying development for me)"
Wonder if having the sitter give Croix a bath is a good idea.
Client arrives.
Give an amazing massage.
Collect Croix who just loves on me, we miss each other.  Say a prayer of gratitude that he survived bath time.  My over protective first time Mom self can breathe a little easier.
Say goodbye to client and babysitter.
Get Croix milk.
Go put him in bed and try not to rush our bed time routine.
Croix is in bed.
Knock on the door.
Next client is here.
Give an amazing massage.
It's after 9 pm, I look out my window to see if the neighbors are still up.  The lights are still on so I hope they are.
Go make arrangements to bring the neighbors dog over to my house since I'll be gone from 10 am to 9 pm tomorrow and poor broken hearted Rusty is still having separation anxiety.
Come home same time Brent gets home.
Shower and tell him about my day.  I realized this day needs to be documented.  Not because it's and extraordinary day but because it's ordinary.  Because this is my life and some day I'll want to remember what it was like when I was working, taking care of a toddler, trying to figure out how to keep my house clean, and Brent was in school.
Current time 10:48 I'm exhausted!

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Because I Always Want to Remember

We have developed a wonderful bed time routine since weaning.  Now that Croix takes a sippy cup to bed rather then nursing Dada is able to join in the bedtime routine.  It has become on of my favorite times of the day.  It goes a little like this.
We'll give Croix a bath (most days) where he will splash around, play games, try to drown, and watch the water go bye-bye.  (I think he's started trying to say bye-bye, can't tell quite yet).  Then Dada will go get the sippy cup of milk while I give (or attempt to give) Croix a massage, and put his jammies on.  Then one of us will hold Croix on our lap in the rocker and the other will sit on the footstool and read stories while Croix drinks his milk.  It's a time of snuggling and learning, giggles and smiles.  Croix will nestle in while being red to.  He's starting to learn how to point.  He's starting to point to things we ask him to, "Croix where's the cow?"  then his sweet little fingers will point to the cow.  We have a mini celebration of his learning, "yay Croix!" at which Croix will happily clap his hands and smile.  He'll point at pages while we read.  Occasionally, when I'm holding, not reading, Croix will glance up at me with his big blue eyes and just smile.  When all the milk is gone and almost every book has been read, at least all his favorites, it's time for our song.  We stand up, go turn off the lights.  Croix will rub his sweet tried eyes as soon as the lights go off.  Then he will lay his little head on my shoulder.   Brent and I will stand facing each other and sandwich Croix in between us, sway back and forth as I sing

"You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy
When skies are gray
You'll never know dear
How much I love you
Please don't take my sunshine away"

While I sing Croix just snuggles us.  He'll put his arms around my neck and hug me for a moment.  Then he'll lay back with his head on his Daddy's chest and giggle.  After we've finished our song he gets to tender kisses.  We lay him in his crib and put a blanket over him, which he promptly grabs with both hands, and pulls in tight to his chest.  He'll then smile at us as we walk out of his room.

Yes this is as tender and sweet as it sounds.  More then one night I've felt the sting of tears in my eyes as I've been overwhelmed with love.  How blessed I am!  I feared I would never have this.  I longed for this wonderful blessing with ever fiber of my being.  I am overwhelmed with gratitude that I am blessed to be a Mother.  Even more blessed to be Croix's Mommy and to have Brent by my side as his Daddy.  As long as some days will be, as trying as some moments my get, I am grateful to get to experience them.  I love that even on the days when I am exhausted, mentally, physically, emotionally, I get to have this little moment.  Some days the words of this song touch my heart even more then others.  "you make me happy when skies are gray".  Perfection in that line.  There is no better way to end a bad day then with this perfect bed time routine.  I dread the day this little routine is no longer desired by Croix.  We won't be able to hold him sandwiched between us when he's 10.  So I will cherish the smell of his freshly washed hair.  The feel of his soft, light arms around my neck.  The innocent way he rubs his eyes.  The look and smile I get while singing to him.  How easily he goes to bed, with a smile!  I'm going to cherish this now because I know some day I'll miss it desperately!

Friday, October 8, 2010

Huge Moving/Yard Sale

Were having a huge yard sale with multiple families, one of which is moving out of state and selling tons of high quality items.


Types of items include

Baby toys clothing shoes

Blankets

Book magazines

Electric amp and two basses

Size 0 wedding dress

Travel system

Mini fridge

Home decor

PlayStation 2 rock band

Electronics

books

small grill

bikes

changing table

small kitchen appliances

bedding

And much much more!

message me if you need directions

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Bored

I'm bored.

Right this moment and kind of with life in general.

How can I be bored with a one year old?  Sure he keeps me on my toes and my day is a constant game of cat and mouse where I follow behind him pulling things from his mouth, pulling him down off of  what ever he's managed to climb upon this time, (he's trying really hard to climb up our dinning room chairs, which means he's about 2 steps [1. climbing on chair 2. learning to push chair in front of what he wants] away from being very dangerous) plus cleaning up what ever mess he just made.  Sure I'm busy enough during the day.  It's just the same thing day after day.

I'm bored.

When I get bored I think of moving.  There are a few places I dream of moving to.
This is one of them:


 Don't you just love how the beach is so white and the water is so clear that you can barely tell where the waves end and the beach begins.
Doesn't this just make you want to lay in a hammock with a great book and a cold drink?  I'd love to sleep and read the afternoon away under this tree!


These are a couple pictures I took when I lived in Puerto Rico.  Sometimes when I'm bored I dream of moving my little family there.  Brent could work as the manager of the resort (making fabulous money of course)  Croix and I could spend our days exploring new beaches.  We could spend our weekends learning to scuba dive, surf, digging for pirate treasure.  We would all be thin and tan.  Our lives would be perfect.  (hey I'm dreaming here)

Then I dream of moving here:
 I think I remember what that white stuff is.  I remember loving it as a child.  
I wonder if Croix would love it too?
Don't you just love how lush and green it is!  Do the mountains take your breath away too?

This is Flagstaff

I dream of us moving there and starting our own business.  It would be wildly successful. I would experience 4 seasons for the first time in more years then I want to think about.  Croix would play outdoors every day.  On the weekends we would mountain bike, go fishing, hike the mountains.  We would play in the snow in the winter.  Enjoy the amazing colors of fall.  Our summers would not be confined to our home.  And Spring, oh spring would be glorious!  Our lives would be perfect (again, I'm dreaming)

I dream of moving other places too, theses are just the two that I dream of most often.  DC comes into my mind.  As does then North West (Oregon, Washington).

Also being bored is making me want to change things.  I'm going to do some redecorating.  Have no fear, I'll do before and after pics.

It also makes me think of crazy things like dying my hair!!!  I've NEVER done that.  I've put in some blond highlights before but never full on colored it.  I think it's a blessing and a curse that I have amazing hair.  Really there is no denying it.  It's my favorite and best feature.  My entire life people have oooh-ed and aaah-ed over it.  I love my hair color.  I really do feel so bless.  BUT I love my hair color, so I feel like it would/could be tragic if I colored it.  Like a sin to change something so God givenly wonderful.  So in my head I think, maybe when I start to go gray I'll do fun things with my hair.  Wait?  When I start to gray?  Like when I'm 40?  Ok so I'll be a 40 year old woman with dark hair and purple highlights?  Humm that might look like I'm desperate for my youth.  Which leaves me thinking, maybe I just need to do it.  Dye my hair.  Have some fun while I'm still young enough to do so.  Why should the rest of the women in America get to have all the fun?  We'll see. Who knows.  I think at least cut is in the future.  I haven't had a hair cut since Thanksgiving last year.  I'm due.

Also I had hot coco for breakfast and I'm enjoying ice cream right now.  Love fall!  It's my favorite season.  I always feel homesick this time of year, because we don't truly get fall.  Not homesick for any location, just for fall.  I'll just enjoy our desert version of fall, because it's what I get and it's better then 110!

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Ballet Under the Stars

There was a Ballet Under the Stars program in Tempe a couple of weeks ago.  My first thought was oh what a fun little family event.  Then I realized it started at 7 and Croix is usually in bed by 7:30.  Which made me think, girls night!  I sent out an email saying let's go have a girls night!  I got a lot of replies saying people were going with their families, guess they all had the same thought I did originally!  I fretted over what to do.  Get a sitter?  We're broke.  Just don't go?  Out of the Question.  Just take Croix and risk a melt down?  I finally settled on the latter.  I moved his morning and afternoon naps down an hour and a half each.  It was a little rough getting the morning one that late.  He sure was grumpy.  I was so paranoid that it wouldn't work and he would melt down.  But I've got to learn to let go of the schedule a little every now and then, so we can enjoy life!  I also thought worse case scenario.  He melts down, we go home, at least we tried.

We also went with Heather, Brent's sister, and our niece Kierstie, and Heathers friend.  Croix did AMAZING!!!!  He loved it!  He sat on Brent's lap and watched with great interest during all performances.  THen during any breaks for costume changes etc he came and played on the ground with me.  Since it was in Tempe there was planes landing at the airport which is very close to where we were.  Croix love, love, loved the planes!  He just stared at them.  They he started reaching for them.  He would follow them, staring, the whole time they flew by.  He enjoyed the ballet, but he sure loved the planes!  Such a boy!

 Croix searching for a snack during intermission.
 Kierstie & Heather's friend
Heather & Brent
 Croix checking out the planes.

Our niece Kierstie also had a wonderful time!

I really could not have asked for a better experience!  Croix did amazing, the ballet was amazing, the weather was amazing!  Glad I decided to forgo the schedule and take the risk!

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Garth Brooks

Years and years ago before I'd ever heard the term "bucket list"  I made a bucket list.  I have added and removed many things from this list.  I put things on my original list that I didn't really think would ever happen, like go to NYC.  As a young girl growing up poor, in a small town in Arizona this seemed near impossible.  I'm happy to report that has happened many times over.  I added things, that when writing them down I was sure would happen.  One item on the list was go to a Garth Brooks concert.  When I put this on the list I knew it would happen one day.  Then Garth Brooks retired, before I was old enough to make things happen for myself.  I feared I'd never get to cross that off my list.  Then one day, not to long ago a friend of mine posted a facebook status about Garth Brooks performing.  I quickly Googled Garth Brooks in Concert Arizona.  Nothing came up.  So I took out the Arizona and found it!  I did some research and found out when and where.  Then discussed it with Brent.  Not wanting to be the one to stand in the way of me completing my bucket list together we decided we'd just have to go on a vacation in October!!!

We got online the day the tickets went on sale.  Sat and waited for the minutes to click over to the golden hour that the tickets went on sale.  Our order was completed, all that needed to be done was to click the buy tickets button.  The clock said 9:00 and we hit that button!  Nothing, tickets not available!!  WHAT???  It took us a couple minutes to realize there is a time difference between us and where ever it was that was selling the tickets.  So we waited another agonizing hour!!  10:00 rolls around, click that little button, and the tickets are ours!!!  I was so excited, I'm picturing Garth Brooks flying over the crowd singing my favorite song!

After he had started performing the show we looked up reviews of the show.  It said it was just Garth and his guitar, singing some of his songs, lots of other peoples songs, then at the end Q & A with the audience.  I became apprehensive, this was not what I was envisioning.  Where did he fly over the audience?  I was so nervous that I would be disappointed in the show.

Fast forward, we are in Las Vegas.  Because of unforeseen circumstances we are late checking into our hotel.  I have zero time to get ready.  Literally no time!  I just changed my clothes as quickly as possible, forgot to even check my day long, tired, traveling, makeup that thankfully I had at the very last minute decided to throw on that morning.  We tried not to rush as we put Croix down for the night.  I tried to ignore his cries as we rushed out the door leaving him in the safe care of my old friend Kalena.  We got to the car to hurried to the show.  Then got LOST!!!  The show started at 8 and we left the hotel at 7:15 and we got lost!!!  We had mapquested how to get there, on foot!  We thought we would have plenty of time to get there, not be rushing last minute!  We're driving on this stretch of road that feels like a freeway with no exits, nowhere to turn around and my heart starts pounding!  I'm going to be late, or what if I'm so late they won't let us in and I miss the whole thing!!!  I take a very deliberate deep breath.  Stressing out is not going to help me be alert as I drive so I can find the place.  We are finally able to turn around and go back to where we started from.  We go a different way and make it there.  Like it or not we valet the car, no time to park!  Rush in and go through an entire casino to will call.  We had intended to get the tickets prior to the show, but again unforeseen circumstances prohibited us from doing that.  We get to will call and man oh man are they serious about security!  We have to show picture ID, the credit card we purchased the tickets with, and our confirmation email.  They put wrist bands on us and if that was not enough, just for good measure they put a stamp on our hands, that you can only see with a black light!  I don't think anyone scalped those tickets!

We landed in our seats with only a few moments to spare, but we made it before the show started!  I felt like a child on Christmas morning.  I was giddy with anticipation.  Garth came out dressed in tennis shoes, jeans, an old T-shirt, and a baseball cap and proceeded to tell the story of his life through music.  It was amazing!  He started by singing songs that had influenced him.  He started way back in the 60's.  Some how I knew the songs he sang.  Don't ask me how I was born over 2 decades after some of the songs he sang were released, but I knew them and sang along.  It was awesome to hear him sing his musical influence and then have him sing a song of his own, and hear the previous artist in the song.  He was funny!  He was personal.  It was very intimate.  It was amazing the emotion that completely enveloped the room.  At the end he did his Q & A.  He gave audience members the opportunity to ask questions, request songs, share stories of how his songs had affected their lives.  There was a very touching moment when a woman requested a song for her husband recently returned from Afghanistan.  Garth gave a very humble and heartfelt thank you to this man for his service to our country.  The entire audience leapt to their feet to offer this returned soldier a long and hearty standing ovation.   After performing the requested song another lady stood and requested Bellea Wood and dedicated it to the soldier.  The lyrics to this song, are touching, in this setting they struck to the heart.  There was barely a dry eye in the place.  Even Garth got choked up, even Brent felt the tenderness of the moment.  Late when Garth performed The Dance I cried.  Who cannot relate to that beautiful song.  Who has never loved someone and lost them, weather it be an old flame, a family member, even the turing of time and loosing the happiness of our circumstance.  I also shed a tear or two during The River, and We Shall Be Free.  Oh how I love those songs!  I loved every song he sang.  The only one I had hopped to hear and did not was Unanswered Prayers.

For all my worrying that I would be disappointed, the show by far surpassed what I had originally hoped for.  It was the best show I've ever been to.  One I will not soon forget.  It was worth every penny, and that is saying a lot for cheep me because it cost a lot of pennies!


We paused a moment in our rush to snap  a couple pics.
As tight as they were with security getting into the the show they were equally tight on security regarding picture taking.  Security came and made you delete any pictures taken during the show.  I knew this before hand and so I didn't bother bringing the camera. This just left my camera on my phone to catch a couple pics before and after the show.
 That is Garth Brooks guitar waiting for him to come and play it!
 That is Brent and I waiting for Garth Brooks, who do you think is more excited?
 This is my ridiculously cheesy happy face after the show.