Thursday, April 26, 2012

Terrified!

I have lots I need to post about, vacation, sickness, Croix's cuteness.  But I'm going to start with what is overwhelming me right now, the terrified feeling I have.

When Croix turned 2 we moved him to a toddler bed, thinking it would help with potty training.  It did not work, or help.  In fact it led us to a downward spiral of no sleep.  You might remember reading about it here.  We put him back in a crib and it almost immediately it fixed him.  With a baby coming I've been scared to even think about taking him out of the crib so she can have it.  I figured we'd wait as long as we could to try switching him again.  Or maybe even buy another crib!

While we were on vacation Croix climbed out of the pack and play.  I guess when we got home he figured out he can do the same thing with his crib.  The first time he climbed out my heart sunk.  It felt like the beginning of the end.  At first it was just at nap time.  The he started climbing out in the morning.  We talked about it and figured if he can climb out of his crib, it's not much different then a toddler bed.  Everything I've read about helping an older sibling adjust to a new baby says if they are still in a crib transition them before the baby comes so it's a separate event then the baby, and it doesn't feel like the baby is stealing their bed.  So really now is the time.  Despite being so scared to even try I told myself that he is older.  He understands things better.  He knows his numbers so we put a clock in his room and reminded him he doesn't get up until 7.  We can reason with him.  It will go much better this time.  Two days in and it has not.

It is 6:15 AM.  He's been awake for 30 minutes.  I went in showed him his alarm clock that said 5, not 7 and said it's still night time Croix, you need to go back to sleep.  He has not.  Yesterday he did not really take a nap.  He's still tired from vacation and woke up too early yesterday too, so after hours of putting him back in bed he finally cried himself into exhausted sleep next to his door.  He didn't even sleep an hour.  I am literally on the verge of a panic attack here.  All I can think is in a matter of weeks I'm going to have a new baby that is going to eat every 2 hours, and I'm not going to get any sleep at night.  Croix's going to wake up at 5 in the morning, not take naps.  I'm not going to get any sleep, Croix's not going to get enough sleep and will be grumpy and exhausted too, and I am going to die.  And if death is not so kind as to take me in such a situation, surly depression, anxiety, exhaustion will overtake me.  I can't do that.  I KNOW I can't do that.  I'm so terrified.  I was worried about sleep with a toddler and a baby before this problem even presented it's self.  To say I'm terrified is not an exaggeration..

We still have a little time.  I'm praying my hardest we can teach him how to sleep in a big boy bed before the baby comes.  Another miracle might be the only solution.

4 comments:

Kendra said...

We have a hard time with our boys getting up early but luckily not that early. An option to consider would be putting one of those child door locks on the inside of his door so he can't come out. Then go in there every morning at 7 am, no sooner. And just keep doing everything else the same when it's time to put him to bed for either naps or at night and don't make a big deal out of him not sleeping. He'll catch on quick to your anxiety so try to not have any or he'll figure out moving to the new bed is a big deal and continue being a pain. It may take a few weeks but he'll figure it out. With our 2nd child we had to pull the mattress out of the crib and tell him it was broken because he loved it so much and didn't want to change beds and we had a baby coming too!

Jessi said...

It always gets worse before it gets better. I promise you it will get better. When I made this transition with my son when he was about 15mos, it was 2 weeks of HELL but he will adjust. Stay consistent. Put him back in his bed as many times as you need to but don't engage conversation. Also, if he doesn't take a nap I will suggest having quiet time. Those quiet time hours give me a break and saves my sanity. Plus you'll need that time once your new baby comes. During 'quiet time' my son will sometimes doze off, or read books but he has to stay in his bed.

Good luck! Hang in there-- it does get better. You're doing a good job. :)

Erin L said...

I know it is like, the mother of all parenting sleep no-nos, but I'll tell you what, I laid down next to my daughter for a long time to get her to sleep at night. Still do sometimes (she's 5). I actually kinda like the snuggles and some day they'll be all grown up and won't want me to do that. Of course, it was usually the days when I did not want to lay down next to her that she needed it the most. (Still is...) My son, too, I laid down next to him to get him to nap.

The Kleyn Family said...

Oh, how frustrated you must be!! Seems like my kids always tested me in the absolute worst possible way, right before their new sibling was about to debut. I've never had the transition to a big bed difficulty though, I WISH I had some great advice for you....keep doing what you're doing, I guess. You are a fabulous momma, even if it feels like you're losing it! And vent, never ever keep it all in! I'll keep my fingers crossed. :)